Toddlers easily become bored with the shopping experience. Try to involve them in the process. For instance give them a chance to make a choice in the purchases. For instance ty saying something like this. "Both the apples and pears look pretty good, which one would you rather have? You get to choose." Avoid giving them open ended choices, they may pick items that make you wallet lighter than you intend, or may not have the best nutritional value.

It the first the month outside the womb, your baby is in an unfamiliar environment. Dr. Harvey Karp in his DVD video, The Happiest Baby on the Block, describes a method that is almost always effective.

I have had unbelievable success with this technique. I wish I knew about it when my children were infants.

Ever have one of those days when your toddler and you just don't seem to get along? Sometimes one of you are coming down with a cold or flu. Other times there are no apparent reasons.

Emotions are contagious. If you are upset about something, maybe an unresolved argument with you spouse, this could be rubbing off on your toddler.

Maybe your toddler is just having a bad day. In any case, the "turn around the day" tactic is appropriate.

1. Count to three or ten or one honored, whatever it takes to calm yourself.

2. Stop what you are doing. Plan on spending at least 10 minutes with your toddler. Think about what you are going to do with your toddler during this time. This could be having a milk and cookie snack break, reading a book, etc.

3. Move yourself and your child to a different part of the home than where most of the trouble has been occurring.

4. Focus on keeping your self calm while complimenting your child on anything. "You have such a nice smile". "You might have some food on your face but it looks like you are having fun". Put a positive spin an everything you say. If you have trouble coming up with things to say, simply be the commentator ... enthusiastically announce a play by play of what your child is doing at the moment.

This tactic works wonderfully. It reinforces the parent child bond. It improves self esteem for both of you. And best of all it turns the day around.

 

Some children are simply finicky eaters. Others just plain don't like some foods, just like adults. Another truth is that children will not starve if food is available.

There are three things that you cannot make you child do and eating is one of them. But you can create the situation where your picky child will be more likely eat what put at the table.

If a child will not eat all the food, simply take it away and do not provide food until the next meal time. Make it clear that once she leaves the table, that there is nothing to eat until the next time to eat. The choice is hers. Don't make a big deal out of it.

Young children typically need five or six feeding a day including the traditional "3 squares". Fruit, grain or cheese snacks between meals will insure that nutritional needs are met.

Of course if a dessert is planned after dinner, that's out. But frame it in such a way that it is your child's choice not to have dessert and not as a punishment, such as "If you choose to eat all your beans, then you choose to have ice cream later. If you choose not eat eat your vegetables, then you choose not to have ice cream. Which to you choose?"

But be sure to enforce your child's choice. Remember that you would have chosen for him to have ice cream, but he freely made the other choice.

Needless to say, avoid serving dishes that you know your child detests, or at least don't offer them. To this very day, I still refuse to eat beets.

It is not unusual for a child to balk at going to bed. Develop and implement a consistent bedtime ritual.

1. Begin the ritual by calming the environment. e.g. turn down the TV, start talking more softly. Maybe read a book.

2. Warn them in advance at least twice that it is almost bedtime.

3. Within the ritual offer them choices. For example "would you like to brush your teeth before you take your bath or afterwards?" "Which pajamas to you want to sleep in tonight?"

4. Tuck them in bed and sit with them a moment.

These are just examples, but they are very helpful. You can even start when they are one day old. At this point you will be training yourself, but it has a huge impact on language learning when you tell your baby what your are doing while you are doing it.

 

Every child is entitled to have a one on one relationship with each parent. One way to do this is to set aside at least 30 minutes everyday (for toddler) and longer periods of time, not necessarily every day, during the week for older children and adolescents.

Give them the opportunity to choose the special even if you know that it will bore you to tears. For younger children especially toddlers, present a closed end choice such as "we can read a book we can draw, which do you choose".

For older kids let them choose. It's up to you to decide money will be spent, but I would recommend that you avoid spending money for this special time.

Make sure that this activity is available regardless of the child's recent behavior. At least acknowledge that he or she has had a bad day if this is the case. Stress that this is a special time for us to be together.

Each parent should spend this one on one time as frequently as possible for all the children in the family, regardless of age.

There is nothing in the "parenting manual" that says your are required to answer your child's questions immediately. If your daughter wants to spend a sleep over at a friend's home or if you son wants to go fishing with a friend and his dad, the answer should not be automatic. A really effective response would be to say, "Let me think about it and talk to Mom (or Dad).

If you child has a bunch of explanations about why she should be permitted to go to the sleep over, listen to the reasons, and list them back to her so she knows that you heard heard her. But insist that you want to think about it, and talk it over with the other parent. Even if you know what the answer is going to be.

There are two very important benefits to this approach.

For this strategy to work BOTH parents have to agree to be patient.

Peer pressure is relentless. Your teen's friends and associates are going to have an ever increasing influence on them no matter what happens. Most of the time, our children know what is OK and what is not OK. (We hope).

It can be difficult for your adolescent to get out of a potentially dangerous situation, drugs, alcohol, sex etc. In addition to the classical parental heart-to-heart conversations, I suggest that you make it clear to them that they can blame YOU for not complying with their peer's pressure to participate thing that your teen knows that he should not. Make it clear that you are the "heavy". Give your teen an opportunity for a face-saving, safe exit.